35 Weeks, Almost!

The big news is: I'm almost 35 weeks pregnant with baby "z" as my mother-in-law calls him. Yes, we've picked a first name and a middle name, but just like with the birth of our first son we're not really telling anyone just yet. I'll just say, I've never heard of anyone with the name, but a distant friend in Norway tells me it's quite a popular name in Europe . . . kind of like our first son's name: Aleksander. The middle name is another family name like Michael. Somehow, we picked both the first and middle names mutually. I'm quite pleased with how it turned out and I think my husband is too.

I was finally able to see my doctor Hess, the brilliant man who's delivered only God knows how many babies in the last 40+ years. He disagreed with the young midwife who saw me 3 weeks prior and said he didn't think I needed to be on any type of restrictions. The baby is a perfect 5-5.5lbs and will be born any time it likes. This man loves me, because I am not 300lbs, like he claims all his other mothers are. Anyway, he expects I'll have another 6lb something oz baby as he's a firm believer the babies are usually proportional to the size of the mom.

Still, my husband has been doing most of the chores around here. It seems like people in general like to help out a highly pregnant woman. My father-in-law, even though I told him I'm free to go back to my motherly duties, wants to watch my son Monday and his wife wants to watch him Tuesday. I'm not opposed. I've noticed my required dosage of sleep has increased from about 9 hrs/day to about 12 hrs. So, having help these weeks has made me feel better overall.

Glasses have been popular in our household these days. We're taking advantage of a vision plan that we'll opt out of when the baby comes. The ones my son likes to wear are from the 3D movie avatar. But, my husband got his first pair of glasses ever--for working on the computer at work. He looks awesome, but that's beside the point; hopefully they'll help with his headaches. I got my umpteenth pair but only my second ever pair or plastic frames. I'm a glasses snob and not a fan of plastic, but the price was right and I'm not one to pass up a $250 discount on glasses.

Some things are happening upstairs in our house. Throwing out the guest queen bed, moving a twin up there in the meantime for guests and for my son's future bed, moving everything else around eventually: crib, changer, children's furniture, rocking chair. It's not easy logistically. Let's just say it's not just being cooped up in the winters that have made me thankful for a big house. There are soon to be four of us. I hate clutter. And with 4 people + frequent guests + a needy pug, we need all the space we can get. Plans are in place and being somewhat executed for decorations in both of the boys' rooms, and I bought myself all new bedding. Our king bed is only 2 years old, so our bedding wasn't that old, but I went cheap when I bought it and it was a mistake. Still, everything we purchased was 40% off this time, but it is good quality, and it is worth every penny. I mean, a person spends a lot of time sleeping. It might as well be enjoyable.

Superdad

Did I ever mention how much I love, cherish, and am thankful for meeting and marrying my husband? He is smart, sexy, and most importantly a good guy who is loving and protective of his family. And these past couple of weeks have really brought these qualities to light.

After I returned from the doctor almost 2 weeks ago and brought news that I am supposed to lie down when I can, drink a lot of water, empty my bladder often, and not do anything to induce contractions if you know what I mean, my husband really took the news seriously. He has been taking care of all of the chores, taking care of my son, and taking care of me. This is no easy feat for a man with a full-time job, an almost 2 year old, a huge house, and now a babysitter who has gone on vacation.

It has gone well. I'd say there was maybe one day the kitchen got out of control, another day we didn't have a fire in the wood stove, and one day my son wore pants that were too short. Not bad, right! There was one day I got into trouble because I had posted christmas card photos on our refrigerator and another day I was accused of going to Taco King, which wouldn't have been surprising knowing my love for the food. However, I've been a pretty good girl. I've watched television. I've napped. I've done crafts (lying down). It's been boring, but I am trying to enjoy it. Soon, peace and quiet will be a thing of the past. And my wonderful husband keeps me in check and tells me to go lie down when I start to go crazy picking up toys or futzing around in the kitchen or if I even think of lifting up my 30lb son.

I think we have him to thank that this baby is still inside me at almost 34 weeks.

Baby Web Pages

Wow! People really go crazy when you have your first baby. I just finished up a scrapbook, which required I go through cards we received during my son's birth. It reminded me of all of the cards, the gifts, the kind words . . . and I didn't even have a normal shower. Because my son was born early, I missed my work shower by about 3 days. My family threw a shower for me in MN, but I could only watch it via web cam. And there was kind of a shower on my husband's side, but it was really just a few gifts and a cake thrown on the side of the normal annual family memorial day barbeque. This time, all we've received is one (darling) outfit from my college roommate . . . not that we need more stuff.

My mom made this website for my son Aleksander's birth two years ago. It was fun and a huge success:

http://www.babyhomepages.net/shefnicka_grandbaby_bragbook

So, we started one that we will use for the announcement of our second son's birth. I don't expect the same response, but it is a fun way to spread the news to those who are far away:

http://www.babyhomepages.net/kvaschik

Let's Talk about Canda

Our trip to Vancouver was the best of the best. Yes, our condo was expensive. But, it was nice. It was great to only have to care for 800 square feet of space and it was convenient that we had all the amenities and more at our home away from home. I don't know if I could stay in a hotel again . . . not that I remember the last time I vacationed in a hotel. I don't think I ever have. I'd rather stay home in my nice house.

The city and the people (in my opinion) were also the best of the best. It is one of the most densely populated cities in North America. Most people don't drive cars or own houses. Oh, poor Americans who are losing their 3,000 square foot homes . . . NOT. They live in sky-rises and walk. And they are happy. And they are kind. I could move to Vancouver in a heart-beat. It's green. It's wooded. It's modern. They have 4 seasons. It's a great place for adults, and it's great for kids. Their Science World really puts the Science Museum of Minnesota to shame. A great aquarium, a touristy market, felafels, Thai, authentic burritos, ski resorts, good coffee, shopping . . . all spell heaven to me and my family. And, get this, their television news has substance to it.

Anyway, no wonder Vancouver and Whistler were chosen to host the 2010 Winter Olympic Games.

What a happy trip. Here are some photos:

Vancouver

Big trees, canyons, suspension bridges

Little Canadian playing in condo

Grouse Mountain, a ski resort

Whistler

Aquarium

Last but not least, this is my Sadie girl, a friend from college who is now my neighbor in Alaska. She cared for our house and our dog Harley for a good part of the month. Thanks! We get to watch her kitties in return :) She loves her new Canadian snowboarding sweatshirt!

By the way, I would recommend vacationing during Christmas. We avoided the consumerism and the receiving of gifts that no one really likes anyway. We spent our money on what we wanted to do and that was our gift to ourselves, our family. In addition, it was an excellent way to break up the winter!

Creative and Crafty Projects

Anyone who knows me knows I need to stay busy. Usually, I'm only intellectually or physically busy. I am addicted to school, the structure of classes and their requirement to learn to receive an "A" and of course the end goal of getting some sort of degree. I love the outdoors and exploring new places, which goes hand-in-hand with physical work. However, I've also been finishing up some creative projects these last few months. With a 2300 square foot house to care for and a sweet boy to look after usually I don't take time for these types of things:

• Finishing a scrapbook that was started for me almost 2 years ago
• Knitting a scarf for myself that I started over a year ago
• Growing my first garden and keeping alive my first (expensive) transplanted trees
• Raising red wigglers to compost our food into fertilizer
• Organizing 4 years of photos. We won't even talk about how many photos there were. Just think: love, built a new house, lots of travel, and a baby = A LOT!
• Making my son's first Halloween costume, which required that I learn how to use my sewing machine
• Sewing a fleece bug blanket for my son's new big boy car bed
• Hand sewing personalized blankets/quilts for my sweet cousins' babies, the cousins who threw me a baby shower in MN when I wasn't even there!
• Cooking new meals and starting a recipe binder
• Buying my first set of curtains, and I hate curtains

Okay, well, I know it doesn't sound like much, but it was a shift for me. As my mom recently asked, "So, you've pretty much given up on becoming a rocket scientist now that you're a mom?" I confirmed, happily. I could still be the smartest of the smart, but I don't want to be a "rocket" scientist anymore. I love this relaxing stint in life and the chance to try to be creative.

Whoa, Baby

So, my initial fear was that our baby would be born out of state or even out of country prior to 32 weeks, but now my fear is that our baby will be born prior to 34 or even 36 weeks. I read, 98% of 32 week old babies survive and 99% of 34 week old babies survive. However, 36 weeks is the better cutoff as really my babies run about 1/2 week big and 37 weeks is considered full-term.

As I suspected, but who can know these things but a doctor, the baby is very low. As a matter of fact, I am certain that for the last 5 weeks minimum (since week 27) the head has been down. There were brief moments in the last 5 weeks that I felt pressure on my ribs and shortness of breath, but during this pregnancy there was not any distinction between before and after the baby dropped or engaged its head in my pelvis. It just happened as quickly as the head went down I guess. While I'm not missing the feeling of a huge belly, the shortness of breath, and the constant rib jabs that come with holding the baby high, having the baby's head constantly pushing its way through my pelvis is not fun either.

I want this baby to stay in as long as possible, so I'm playing the gravity game. I am lying down as much as I possibly can. And let me tell you, it does feel a lot better to do this. Still, I can't help but believe this will only help so much and the baby is just going to come out if he feels like coming out.

So, hang in there, baby. Two more weeks wouldn't kill you. I know we're all like expert travelers at this point, but Anchorage Neonatal Intensive Care Unit wasn't on my list of places to visit. So, just hang in there. Dr. Hess will soon be back from vacation, and the longer you stick around, the more likely it is he'll let you stay home in Fairbanks with us. Besides, you are too young to be riding in helicopters.

Feeling Big and Bah Humbug

So, I'm 31 weeks pregnant today, only 1 week away from my goal of 32! That's a funny goal, isn't it? Well, I'm so small in structure that I feel like it's hard for me to hold the babies of a 6 foot, 200+ pound daddy for a full 37 weeks. With my last pregnancy, I made it to 36.5 weeks before my water burst so quickly that my stomach shrunk to half the size in an hour. Why 32? Well, after 32 weeks it's likely the baby won't have to take a vacation in a special neonatal hospital . . . far from home: Anchorage or Seattle, an hour or four hour plane ride away. Also, I'll be back at home in Fairbanks before week 32, so I will not be stuck in MN far from daddy or in Canada w/o insurance and a dual citizen preemie w/o a passport and unable to fly home!

Anyway, I am REALLY feeling pregnant these days. I can tell the baby is gaining its 1/2 pound a week now and is growing longer. This baby feels just like the last one did at this time (head down and very low): hiccups several times a day that originate in my pelvis, no rolling or turning, just stretching of the legs/butt/back up in my rib cage. My legs feel like they are 100 pounds each. I have pelvic pain and pressure even when I am lying down. And it is very difficult to walk and catch my breath even when traveling only short distances. My clothes don't fit.

One of my friends was so surprised that we aren't doing Christmas gifts this year. It's not that we're anti-Christmas. Actually, it's normally my favorite holiday: I think more because of the family time it involves than because of the gifts. We've spent so much time with our immediate family lately, there has been so much going on with us traveling for pleasure and work, with my husband teaching, my class, and with the baby coming soon. I guess people just can't relate. I heard that someone wanted to set up our tree for us at our house so it would be there when we get back. All I could think is if you put it up, you better take that thing down! I don't want to see or deal with that thing--however gorgeous it is! I have things to see and do and none of them involve Christmas trees!

This is the first time I've been alone in over a month--since November 18th, when my son last went to his babysitter. My husband and son are playing in a locomotive and my parents are riding bikes around the city. First on my list: hot shower. Second: start my new book.

Bad Pregnancy Night

Tonight is one of what I like to call a "bad pregnancy night." This simply means that for most of the day or evening and now into the night I just don't feel quite right. At some point, I will become tired enough to sleep, but for now the sour stomach, or heartburn, or hormones, or lack of space in my mid section, or whatever you want to call it are taking over and upsetting me. And whenever I don't feel well physically, I don't feel well mentally. I worry. This is a gift I inherited from my mother: worry.

I've been worried for the last few months, since we booked this trip, that I would go into pre-term labor in Canada. Well, I made it through 3 weeks in Minnesota, 4 plane rides, now I have 7 more days in Canada and 2 more plane rides and I'll be home in Fairbanks. I wonder if I'm really only worried that Canada will soon be gone and then I will have nothing to worry about but the baby being born. What will I ever do with 2 children (even though most of the time I'm sure this is what I want)?

I love Canada so far and our condo is accommodating and immaculate and in a lot of ways nicer than our home. Yet, it is tough to be in a new place. I just have to find a way to calm myself no matter where I am. And keep telling myself: there's no sense worrying about things that you cannot control . . . and that everything will be just fine.

20 Days in MN

Usually, when I travel anywhere I am ready to go home after a week or two. However, home is dark and cold at this time of year and there isn't a lot to do there. I'm not sure if that's the reason, but I didn't feel like leaving MN at all during these 20 days. And the last time I've stayed here at my parents' house this long was 5 years ago and before that almost 10 years ago, when this was my home . . . even though we do spend almost a month here a year, it is usually spread over 2 visits.

Anyway, it's been enjoyable. I didn't feel like the visit was rushed or that I was being pulled between spending time with my parents and other friends and relatives. We were able to spend a good amount of time with everyone who made an effort to see us. The few people we didn't see, we spent time with just this last summer when we visited.

There were a few things that made this time in Minnesota different than the others:

This seems strange, being surrounded by 575 acres of mostly trees, but this is the first year in what seems like 20 that we cut down a real Christmas tree (I think only because it was threatened by a beaver dam). It was a balsam, but it was cute and served the purpose.

I was able to see my college roommates for the first time in 3 years. It's been almost 6 years now since we graduated from college. It was the first time I was able to meet Caroline's sister (after hearing about her for almost 10 years), who is due in January, the first time I saw Alicia's boys, and she is due in March, and the last time I will visit Caroline in Minnesota because after 10 years there she is selling her house and Wells Fargo is moving her New York City. I cannot wait until my husband and I are able to drop our boys in MN with Grandpa and Grandma and visit her there!

My cousin Jennie, who is the closest thing I have to a sister, and I are in the 3rd trimester and both due in the middle of February.

My cousin Christina had baby girl Katelyn in August. When she had Hailey, four years ago, I wasn't able to see Hailey until she was about 1 year old.

Gracious Grandpa Greg played Santa this year for the 57 guests at our family Christmas party. After about 10 minutes, my son recognized Santa as Papa, which was actually a good thing. Otherwise, he wouldn't have gone up to get his gift.

Jewelery was a big theme this vacation. It started one Sunday as my aunts, cousins, mom, and I went through my Grandmother's, who passed away almost 12 years ago now, old jewelery. It continued at the family Christmas party where an entire room was dedicated to showcasing the leftover jewelery so that the rest of the family could take what they wanted in remembrance of her. Well, as exemplified above, the boys both young and old had a fun time dressing up (mostly with clip-on earrings) during the party: my cousin Tony, his son Maverick, and my uncle Richard.

It seemed like on this trip, my son found necklaces wherever we went:

Playing at Auntie Laurie's House with cousin Jennie's old toys

Showing off Grandma Koecher's old costume jewelery at the Koecher Christmas

Playing at Grandma and Papa's with mom

Playing at cousin Hailey's house with a bug vaccum

Now, we're off to Vancouver to spend Christmas . . .

Favorites at Grandma and Papa's

Pulling items out of the office desk drawers. I remember finding tons of treasures in there as a kid too. Grandpa and grandma both work for companies that constantly hand out crazy pens and gadgets, like funky looking tape-measures, flashlights, calculators, etc

Filling the electric woodstove with crumpled newspaper . . . and then anything else my son can find that will fit. It can produce heat out of the bottom if turned on, but the door on the front only leads to fake wood so he can fill it just like we adults do with our real woodstoves

Reaching into the cupboards (the rubberbands don't stop him anymore) and even the top drawers in the kitchen and pulling out whatever he finds: spatula's, needle-nose pliars, tupperware, antiques, etc, and then either throwing them back in or stashing them with his toys, depending upon how interesting the object looks

Going outside to visit the horses, which he "moo's" at like they're cows, even though he knows the sounds for horses

Watching television (ie Sesame Street or Thomas the Train) while sitting on his rocking chair and telling us when the DVD needs to be skipped to the next segment

Refusing to eat everything but grandma's home-made organic applesauce from trees on the farm

Waking up at 4 or 5am and asking for "bopa," which is grandpa

The Vacation Has Begun

Me, my son, and my other son in my belly (3rd trimester now) took the long trip to

MN to spend 3 weeks with my parents (his grandparents). Here's my son in action:

Being a good boy, buckled up on the 5 hour leg of the flight,

killing some time with the new DVD player dad bought him

Making his "I'm a ham; laugh at me" face while eating craisens

Sitting in my old rocker, showing Grandma how Neil Patrick Harris

points to him while he sings about Shoes on Sesame Street

Showing off for Grandpa, sporting mom's new shoes

in front of Grandpa's home-made (aweseome) hearth gate

Darkness

It is getting really dark up in Fairbanks, and it isn't even Thanksgiving yet. The shortest and darkest day will be sometime around December 21st. Thanks to my husband having to travel out of state for work for a week, I decided to not only be gone for 10 days in December, but to leave for the whole month. My son and I will be in Minnesota with family and then we'll all travel to Vancouver for a short Christmas vacation.

I'm not really a warm-weather beach fan unless the trip is incredibly remote or expensive and I have an area all to myself and I hate traveling with kids for longer than a day, so vacations just a day south combined with family suit me well. After all, if it's -40 here in Fairbanks, it is probably at least 40, maybe even 80, degrees warmer in Minnesota or Vancouver. Plus, compared to Fairbanks, Minnesota has about 4 and a half more hours of daylight per day. I'd say that's a great place to visit!

Until my trips, I am dealing with the lack of heat and light as best I can. To say people up here are grumpy, sad, etc is an understatement. It's universal. Strangely enough though, I have had a burst of energy lately and have been trying to finish up a bunch of projects. Here's me yesterday in a rush to finish touching up our walls before it became too dark to see anything. The sun was starting to set already in North Pole, AK: only 2:00 pm. But, from 10-2, it was a beautiful, clear day at -30F . . . crystal clear blue skies, pink mountains in the background, and delicately frosted white trees.

Married to a Shiftworker

I refuse to have a long-distance relationship with my husband. Some people put up with being apart for years: military deployments, frequently traveling out of state or flying to other towns for a week or two or more at a time, or even just plain old shift-work close to home.

I don't think it's healthy to be apart from your immediate family for more than about 10 hours. I've done the long-distance relationship thing, done travel, my husband's traveled, we've both been 12-hour shift-workers. I've been the child of a parent who travels for work. It all sucks. There's a good reason you are paid more for that type of work. It significantly reduces your quality of life. And it is 100x worse when there are children in the picture.

Anyway, this only comes to mind because for the first time in years my husband is a shift-worker. He's actually salaried for 40 hours a week, but because of a crisis at work he is stuck working 16 hour days, even on the weekend. So, it's like he's gone. We talk on the phone. They've been buying him food (whoopee). I can't help but wonder if he'll get a bonus for this stint.

.

The Countdown Begins

I'm enjoying a quiet, what has turned out to be an hour, alone by the fire. My husband has assumed the role of "bedtime" duty tonight, which is quite long and lasts usually until 9pm since we started putting our son to sleep in his "big boy car bed." He gets out and wants to play, etc, and is quite smart. Sometimes he'll go to the door and hit it and then run back into his bed and pretend like it wasn't he who made the noise. Plus, he's been sick so the 5am awakenings and request for warm milk have turned into 4am and now 3am and every hour awakenings. I feel today like I'm dying and have a sore throat myself. Pregnancy the second time around, with this little monster at my feet 24/7, is really tough on me and the whole family.

It's November 6th. I feel like the countdown has begun for 1) the end of the semester 2) Christmas and 3) the arrival of our baby boy. Earlier this week, my calendar for November, December, and January was almost completely open, and by today, Friday, almost every week and weekend has something exciting going on. By exciting, I mean swim lessons, exams, a different type of play-date, a holiday party, a double date, a Saturday that grandpa watches his grand-toddler, travel plans for the holidays and for my husband's job . . . that kind of thing. Not really "exciting," but "stuff to do." I am grateful for these things to do, because it is very cold outside and daylight is a thing of the past. I need to socialize or things get hairy.

Anyway, although I like to be busy, the countdown and the plans kind of stress me out. I have my own agenda, which includes a long list of small household projects that I need my husband's help with, preparing the baby's room, redecorating my son's room, and finishing a project for my cousin's baby that has taken much longer than I anticipated. I'm making progress, but slowly. A friend who just moved up here took away a table and chairs and desk, freeing up some space in our house. Today, we replaced the smoke detector batteries, put doorstops on all of our doors, and puttied small holes (dents) in the walls. But, my son, keeping up our household, and doing my schoolwork always come first, so my list seems to become longer before it becomes shorter.