Bad Pregnancy Night

Tonight is one of what I like to call a "bad pregnancy night." This simply means that for most of the day or evening and now into the night I just don't feel quite right. At some point, I will become tired enough to sleep, but for now the sour stomach, or heartburn, or hormones, or lack of space in my mid section, or whatever you want to call it are taking over and upsetting me. And whenever I don't feel well physically, I don't feel well mentally. I worry. This is a gift I inherited from my mother: worry.

I've been worried for the last few months, since we booked this trip, that I would go into pre-term labor in Canada. Well, I made it through 3 weeks in Minnesota, 4 plane rides, now I have 7 more days in Canada and 2 more plane rides and I'll be home in Fairbanks. I wonder if I'm really only worried that Canada will soon be gone and then I will have nothing to worry about but the baby being born. What will I ever do with 2 children (even though most of the time I'm sure this is what I want)?

I love Canada so far and our condo is accommodating and immaculate and in a lot of ways nicer than our home. Yet, it is tough to be in a new place. I just have to find a way to calm myself no matter where I am. And keep telling myself: there's no sense worrying about things that you cannot control . . . and that everything will be just fine.