One week ago I was sitting in the front yard late one evening watching the boys play and wrote, "These summer days are heaven. June through September, each year, are the months that make the cold and dark winters worthwhile. There is a calm in the Interior of Alaska. It's not too hot, not too cold, not too buggy, and so still. The sounds of the wild are not overwhelming. An occasional boat passes by. I've determined that summer is the perfect time to end a pregnancy. There is so much to be happy about that there is no time to dwell on being pregnant."
A couple of days ago those two months of sunny evenings faded away and I predicted that for the month of August, "Summer, in the Interior, is almost over. August is here, which means we will probably receive plenty of moisture and experience temperatures that are good for growing radishes and spinach. The Tanana Valley State Fair starts tomorrow, which to many people indicates cool and cloudy days. The tomatoes plants will start to go downhill. And the first light frost will probably make an appearance."
Yesterday, I thought that my water broke. It terrified me since I am only 33 weeks along and I would idealy like to make it three more weeks so that I can deliver a baby around 6 pounds. One of my boys was born at 36 weeks 4 days and the other at 35 weeks 7 days (just hours shy of 36). It turned out that my water did not break, but it scared me enough into taking it even more easy than I already had been. This evening I stayed home while my family went to enjoy the local State Fair. Immediately, after they left, I recollected the last four weeks of my last pregnancy, where while exhausted I tried to stay horizontal to keep pressure off of the baby's route of exit. This time though I have plenty of energy and while the baby is incredibly low, it is being kind to my body. It takes every ounce of mental strength to restrain myself from doing simple tasks like blanching carrots, vacuuming, or going out to pick those beautiful red, ripe raspberries in our woods. I think I may need to take up a craft that can be done while lying down or get my hands on another great book.
I will continue to remind myself that every hour, every day, and every week that this unborn child stays inside of me is key to its health, development and long-term well-being. I am thankful that I have a wonderful husband who cares for me and our kids, our dog, and our home during the last weeks of each of my pregnancies. And I will try to enjoy this change of pace and the new opportunities and change in perspective that will be ever-present until the baby arrives. Whenever I feel a twinge of nerves, I just look to these two boys and they reassure me that everything is going to turn out wonderfully.
